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The Head Trash + Healing Show with Alexia Leachman


Feb 13, 2015

Are you stuck in your thinking? Do you continually repeat the same unhelpful and self-sabotaging behaviours?
 
Well, how about trying to expand your thinking so that you can see things from new persepctives, find new solutions, experience new ways of thinking and surprising people with new behaviours....
 
DOESN'T THAT SOUND AWESOME?!
 
In today's podcast I encourage you to tap into the law of opposites by having some F.U.N! But serious fun.. serious because by doing so you can create real change in your head and in your life.
 
There are many emotions, valiues and beliefs in life that are labeled as BAD and yet we seem to forget this important point;
 
THERE'S GOOD AND BAD IN EVERYTHING
 
So, when we label something as bad, we're denying ourselves all that is good about it. Similarly, when we label something as good, we miss that there's also polenty of bad lurking.. and so we may not be prepared for it.
 
To illustrate my point I thoight I'd have some find with selfishness. Being selfish is often thought of as a bad trait. And yet, there is much good in it. There's a reason that the airlines want you to put your oxygen mask on before others... you can't look after others, if you're not looking after yourself. Except the problem is, some people get the balance wrong.. and so those people that exhibit a ton of selfishness give it a bad name. But that's not all I'm rtying to encourage you to do here. By opening up your mind to the possible reasons as to why something you think is bad might in fact be good, you are opening up the possibility of new ways of thinking.
 
So my challenge to you is this... if there is a trait in others that annoys you, or that you think is bad.. say... dishonesty, lack of integrity, then try to come up with at least 20 reasons why it's a GOOD thing. Equally , if there's something that you LOVE then come up with 20 reasons why it's BAD. The reason I say 20, is that it forces you to get creative and maybe even be silly just to hit the number... this creativity is magical because it's opening your mind....
 
So how about cranking open your mind and let some magic in.....
 
Here are my starters for 10 on why being selfish is a GOOD thing, and why Generosity (its opposite, at least for me) is BAD.
 

Being selfish is GOOD because....

  • you don’t have to worry about other people
  • you get to do what you want
  • you look after your own needs
  • you don’t waste time doing things that you don’t like or need to do
  • your days are your own and you get lots of ME time
  • other people around you learn to toughen up and get on with things
  • it shows self love and respect
  • you don’t have to spend time with people you don’t want
  • your selfishness teaches others how to be selfish - you're a role model!
  • you get to keep more of your money
  • you have more time to yourself
  • you don’t have to put up with watching crappy films or TV shows
  • people stop asking you to do stuff, because they know you’ll probably say no
 

Generosity is BAD because...

  • your time is never your own - you’re too busy doing stuff for other people
  • you have less money for yourself because you spend money on others “being generous"
  • people start to expect your generosity and
  • you start attracting selfish types and takers
  • people start to advantage of you
  • you attract people who want your money/what you offer and are not there for you
  • you’re being generous for your own emotional needs, so it’s actually quite selfish
  • you find it hard to say no
  • you’re constantly buying gifts for other people.. although the gesture might be appreciated, they might be gifts they probably don’t even want… you’re contributing to waste
  • if you’re generous to expect back, then you’re definitely selfish!
  • If you’re being generous to show that you have money, then you’re insecure… especially if you can’t really afford that round of champagne